Monday, March 21, 2011

All that is bright and beautiful...

When did we become so cynical? When did we stop believing in good endings and happily-ever-afters? When did our first reaction become a sarcastic snort and a sharp toss of the head instead of a smile and a twinkle in the eye? When did we stop wincing upon hearing about massive devastation or a minor loss?
Is it just me or has everybody around become a little tougher, a little harder and a lot less sensitive? We seem to take even major disasters in our stride, as if it is all but natural! Gory details do not seem to disturb us, nor do the sight of atrocities. We just casually flip the newspaper sheet aside or change channels or move on. We voice opinions volubly and knowledgeably and yet never seem to be really touched by the pain that is somebody else's life.
I do not know whether this is a kind of defense mechanism. Perhaps if we let everything affect us, we shall never be able to get on with the daily business of living. So letting it all flow over may seem like a good idea. It is when this becomes a habit and not just a temporary reaction, that it frightens me. Not letting something disturb you and being obviously nonchalant and flippant about it are completely different reactions. But does this mean that we have stopped believing in the good and the beautiful? Have we grown accustomed to everything being gray and dingy and dull and soulless? Or do we at least sometimes wish to see fresh colour around every corner and  look forward to warmth and brightness and life?
I so want to believe in goodness and beauty and justice and all things wise and wonderful. At times I just long for the strength to believe. All else shall fall in to place then. Or so I hope.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Old and new

Have you ever realized that to really accept something new and to make it part of you and your life, you need to let go of the old, at least for a while? You have to get to the point where the new is as much natural for you as the old. And this has to do with acceptance. It takes a lot of conversation with one self and others. It comes with the added baggage of guilt and feelings of disloyalty about all that shall be missed awhile. It is not easy. Trust me. Some heartache, a few tears and a lot of thought and will power are called for.
And surprisingly the new is something that you are looking forward to with all your being. It is exciting and promising. Yet it is frightening. The old is comfortable and warm and something you have gotten used to, till it has become second nature. They say moving on is part of life. But that is easy when you want to break off with the old. Moving on to the new while never cutting off all the strings that bind you to the old is mighty tough. 
At times it seems like all of life is a balancing act. You don't lose perspective and keep your focus on maintaining balance and all shall be well. The only problem is that you are not always lucky enough to have a broad beam to balance on, sometimes you need to walk on incredibly thin ropes... But in the end, it all seems worth the while and the pain and the laughter as long as some one is holding your hand along the way.